🔧 Overview

The Kitchen Table Framework is a two-part daily practice designed to create inner coherence and behavioral integrity for individuals in recovery from compulsive sexual behavior, trauma, or emotional fragmentation:

1. The Kitchen Table Practice — A 5-part, emotionally honest journaling ritual that fosters inner connection and part integration.

2. The DSAP (Daily Spiritual Action Plan) — A values-based action plan that transforms core priorities into simple, lived behaviors.

Together, these practices stabilize the inner world, align daily choices with spiritual truth, and restore self-leadership through consistency and compassion.

✍️ Part 1: The Kitchen Table Practice

(Daily Internal Dialogue – Five Core Parts)

✨ Purpose:

To create a consistent space each day where internal parts are welcomed, heard, and reintegrated. Clients engage with five accessible and emotionally resonant parts, inspired by IFS but simplified for clarity:

🧠 The Five Core Parts:

✅ How to Practice (Step-by-Step)

1. Set aside 5–10 minutes

• Sit with a journal, phone, or laptop

• Optional: Light a candle or breathe to settle

2. Let each part speak in its own voice

Write 1–3 honest sentences from each part.

3. Write without fixing

• Let contradiction exist

• Don’t analyze

• Some days, just one part may speak—that’s okay

This is not performance. This is presence.

🛠️ Part 2: The DSAP

(Daily Spiritual Action Plan – Behavioral Practice)

✨ Purpose:

To bring your soul's values into motion—even when you're tired, afraid, or disconnected.

You must begin by clarifying what you deeply value. Otherwise, your actions will feel empty.

🔮 VALUES CLARIFICATION EXERCISE

Ask yourself:

• “If I were to get hit by a bus in three weeks, how would I have wanted to live?”

• “What would I want to be remembered for?”

• “What kind of person do I want to be in my child’s memory?”

• “When I feel most like myself, what am I doing?”

• “Who or what do I most want to honor with my time on earth?”

Write down 5–7 values or themes that emerge.

Examples: honesty, creativity, joy, healing, freedom, presence, courage, gentleness, service, connection, God, truth.

These will become the "columns" or themes of your DSAP.

You don’t need to use my hierarchy—but here’s mine, and why it works for me:

1. Honor My Creator — I didn’t create myself. I choose to call the higher power God. My life is a gift, and my first priority is to honor the One who gave it.

2. Care for the Vessel — God gave me a body and a mind to use wisely. I must care for this vessel through rest, nutrition, movement, and discipline.

3. Serve the Mission — I was given these gifts for a purpose: to serve God’s work. That means asking what work is mine to do, and doing it with focus and integrity.

4. Love Those Closest to Me — This mission isn’t carried out in isolation. I begin with my loved ones—my spouse, my children, my community.

5. Generate and Steward Resources — To serve well, I must also provide. I work to create abundance, not for ego, but to support the people and causes that matter most.

Feel free to adopt, edit, or completely replace this hierarchy. What matters is that it means something to you.

🔄 Now... build your DSAP

Each morning, list 1–3 specific behaviors that reflect your highest values.

🙏 Gratitude 2.0

(Feel It Before You Write It)

This is not about listing what you're supposed to be grateful for. It's about connecting emotionally with what you'd miss deeply if it were taken away.

How to Practice:

1. Choose something (e.g., your daughter's health).

2. Visualize losing it. Not to scare yourself—but to access real gratitude.

3. Let yourself feel the sorrow or fear.

4. Then write: "Thank you for..."

5. Repeat with 4–5 things.

“I imagine what it would feel like to lose my safe home. I picture the fear. Then I write, 'Thank you for the quiet and safety of my home.' And I feel it.”

This practice changes everything.

🤞 Final Integration

Each day:

1. Sit at the Kitchen Table. Hear the parts.

2. Write your DSAP, grounded in your values.

3. Live the next right thing.

You don’t need to fix everything. Just start with:

• Who needs to be heard?

• What really matters today?

• What action can I take that honors my soul?

That’s the Kitchen Table. That’s the practice. That’s the way home.